Exodus 18:19-20 (KJV)
Hearken now unto my voice, I will give thee counsel, and God shall be
with thee: Be thou for the people to God-ward, that thou mayest bring
the causes unto God: [20] And thou shalt teach them ordinances and laws,
and shalt shew them the way wherein they must walk, and the work that
they must do.
What is some of the best advice you have ever been given? Whether a piece
of advice shared in passing, or hearty counsel given regularly, one's
support in the lives of others should be seriously considered. Moses faced
quite a task in having been given the responsibility for bringing Israel
out of bondage. So too, do you and I face quite a task whenever it comes
to assisting others in bringing them out of spiritual, emotional, and
physical captivity to wrong behavior. Many women look to one another for
advice - are you sure you are leading ladies down the right path with
your response?? Are you sure you are getting the right counsel yourself??
In the above portion of scripture, Jethro advised Moses how to deal properly
with the various problems people would bring to him for help. It was the
business God had called Moses to and he would need wisdom as a leader.
Ladies, don't ever think yourself too wise to be counseled! Rather than
being insulted by it, Moses received the counsel Jethro gave him and fortified
himself in the fear of the Lord. Not only should we encourage others to
be useful, we should be quick to study to be useful ourselves…
1 Thes. 4:13-18 (KJV)
But I would not have you to be ignorant, brethren, concerning them which
are asleep, that ye sorrow not, even as others which have no hope. [14]
For if we believe that Jesus died and rose again, even so them also which
sleep in Jesus will God bring with him. [15] For this we say unto you
by the word of the Lord, that we which are alive and remain unto the coming
of the Lord shall not prevent them which are asleep. [16] For the Lord
himself shall descend from heaven with a shout, with the voice of the
archangel, and with the trump of God: and the dead in Christ shall rise
first: [17] Then we which are alive and remain shall be caught up together
with them in the clouds, to meet the Lord in the air: and so shall we
ever be with the Lord. [18] Wherefore comfort one another with these words.
There are three points above that we need to consider when it comes to our support of others who are struggling. First of all, we are not to sorrow as they do. In other words, we are not to adopt the same hopeless perspective they have on their problems. For example, let's say that your close friend calls you in despair over her marriage and you side with her all throughout the conversation. That is the same as sorrowing as she is sorrowing! Ladies, as Christians, we are never to agree with others if God has condemned their viewpoint. Sympathy and support is not enough; rather than taking a passive role in their problem, we must encourage them to continue in behavior that would follow the Word of God and engage in such activities as would please the Lord. As Jethro said to Moses, "Be thou for the people to God-ward." Show them the way they must walk and the work they must do.
Secondly, those coming to you for advice must be reminded even in the face of their problems that one day they will meet the Lord. Your advice must always be given with God's perspective in mind. Every solution must be viewed in the light of eternity! Bring the causes to God, as Jethro said, and shed scriptural light on every issue. Do your solutions stand before God as adequate and in line with His way of doing things? In combination with the third point, you may think it callous to bring the reality of coming face to face with the Lord into your discussion with a distraught individual, but truth is what sets us free, amen? Ladies, we are told by God to comfort one another with His words, not the words we "feel" will help! Don't deaden their spirits or weaken them further... When the time comes, will you faithfully support others as you should - regardless of who they are in relation to you??
Hebrews 12:12-15 (KJV)
Wherefore lift up the hands which hang down, and the feeble knees; [13]
And make straight paths for your feet, lest that which is lame be turned
out of the way; but let it rather be healed. [14] Follow peace with all
men, and holiness, without which no man shall see the Lord: [15] Looking
diligently lest any man fail of the grace of God; lest any root of bitterness
springing up trouble you, and thereby many be defiled;
When we fail in following after holiness (to do things God's way), there is no success experienced in our lives, there are no victories won. Be very careful that you do not support sinful behavior. It makes a great mess of things! If your support approves of the failure of the one you are helping to handle their problems, then you are doing nothing more than destroying their hope in God by reinforcing their faulty behavior. As Christian women, we are to offer DIRECTION from the scriptures, not just some type of support that silently stands by. Otherwise, you are representing Christ as a helpless Savior who has no solutions to your friend's problems - and that is not true! If you came across a motorist whose car was stalled on the road, would you pull over just to stand by and support them in their situation with words like, "I know how you feel, my car was stalled once before." Perhaps you would just put your arm around the person and stare together at their broken down vehicle, not saying a word? Or would you pull over to give them a push and get the car rolling again??
Hebrews 10:24 (KJV)
And let us consider one another to provoke unto love and to good works:
Think about the last time a woman complained to you of the bad treatment she was receiving at home... Did you challenge her by offering her a Biblical course of action to take? Did you show her that there is a possibility for change in her home - beginning with her?? Did you point out that though we can't alter the behavior of others, we can change ourselves? Hence, changes in us can lead to changes in others. As seen in the verse below, any lesser help given is unchristian!
1 Cor. 10:13 (KJV)
There hath no temptation taken you but such as is common to man: but God
is faithful, who will not suffer you to be tempted above that ye are able;
but will with the temptation also make a way to escape, that ye may be
able to bear it.
How about you, dear lady? Could you take such advice yourself?? Has it made a difference in your life? It is not wise for any of us to murmur against God's commands. He has made a way of escape whenever we are tempted to handle things in a fleshly way. Advise others to look for the right way out and take it - obeying God! Do not let them hang their hat on the hook of excuses, placing their failures on the shoulders of others. If the one you are helping is not performing as God requires, their failure is no fault but their own. Anyone can be delivered from their trials and troubles; anyone can prevent their falls and recover themselves when they do fall, but not if they deny the power and promises of God!
Psalm 145:14 (KJV)
The Lord upholdeth all that fall, and raiseth up all those that be bowed
down.
Finally, much support today as given by various individuals chosen as counselors is dead support - it's without recommendation of works meet for repentance. Dead counseling represents a dead God! It's distorted. To analyze problems without a Biblical solution is to be nothing more than a spectator, a bystander. Ladies, works must accompany our faith in the Lord. Be certain that your support always supports the truth and that the support you are given motivates you to do right. Otherwise, it's harmful... Be thou for the people to God-ward!
God Bless,
Pam
Isaiah 60:1&2
Copyright 2001 Pamela A. Iannello
Revised 2004
